Horde

Toy review: Dragstor

Toy review

Dragstor was one of my earlier figures if I remember correctly. And weirdly the attached mini comic ruined him for me. Not the whole comic, but one image in it haunted me for a while. Almost 40 years later I had to look it up again. There are actually some videos about the mini comic on YouTube.

It shows the making of, what means Hordak turned a ‘weak little sop’ into ‘The warrior machine’. That’s the mini comic’s title, and though Dragstor turned out to be a war machine, for me he was the poor guy, the victim, the poor little sop. And there is this image of his face in horror while he’s magically transforming. That ruined it for me. A super villain can’t be a regular guy that transformed within a moment. Or can it? Not back then though.

The figure itself was well made I find. It was different than the standard figure, in dark blue and quiet heavy. The ripcord mechanism to start the engine was working well, while the paint was durable. So quality wise I had no concerns.

The body though, especially the arms, appeared a bit weak to the young me. And the unavoidable crossbow for horde members was a bit boring.

My uv light photo shows him in a different way. He’s mid blue, reminding me on the New Adventures Nocturna. The grey metal, the red bat on his chest, boots and parts of his outfit, as well as the orange gloves disappeared in the uv light.

Nowadays, especially after writing ‘Titfortat 11: Dragstor vs. Mekaneck: Machine neck’ I finally see his potential. A loud, powerful engine, vibrating, smoking, with unbearable power, torque, speed and noise. That’s a scary war machine, not a sop!

Dragstor in uv light

Titfortat 13: Mantenna vs Snake face

Titfortat

Two of the shortest evil monsters of Eternia are in the ring.

This titfortat is for sure not about size, it’s about black magic, about the power to fight without muscles. Monsters are they for sure, not many creatures are less human than these two. Mantenna, an insectoid with huge humanish eyes, Hordaks spy and hypnosis expert is only 1.6m and 70kg. He’s smart and fast, but a weak fighter. 34 points in total.

Snake Face is easily King Hiss’ most feared follower. Medusa could be his little sister, and nightmares are his hobby. 32 points, because his magic is weak. Fast and smart is he too.

We can only guess that this titfortat is happening to eliminate at least one of them. Who ever decides on the matches will it do it with humanity in its mind. Or cruelty? We will see how if one of them manages to survive here. Start.

In the ring, both opponents appear with their eyes closed! Are we seeing a fight in the dark?! That could be a smart move! Both, insects and snakes have the senses for it. They are both super fast, and that’s what we see here. A quick back and forth, careful, evaluating. Without any physical contact, Mantenna and Snake face are in a kind of a dance. They haven’t met before, I’m sure they want to know who’s in front of them. It’s like a ring fight, but a blind one. Mantenna’s movements look a bit weird, his four legs are tipping in a hypnotic way. Snake Face is much more elegant, like a cobra, keeping his head up high. Then the insectoid jumps! Two legs wrapping around the Snake man, while the other two legs stabilize the duo to not fall. It remains a dancing act, but the horde member hammers his tiny fists onto the medusian face. Snake Face uses his hand for defense, obviously doesn’t know how to react. He unleashes the face snakes, but they can’t turn Mantenna into stone when his eyes are closed. But who would have guessed, they’re snakes, so they can bite! Tiny snakes aiming for Mantenna’s eyes, the red and blue insectoid has to retract. He jumps off his opponent, who is now in full fight mode. Mantenna knows that, because of the bite attack. The Snake man’s answer to Mantenna’s attack is a weird forward move, and it seems like he’s reaching for the eyes! Is the Medusa monster so limited to the turn-to-stone thing? He’s obviously trying to open Mantenna’s eyes, to make him look at the snakes! And then an elbow-to-the-chin initiates the horde members response. Another elbow, the little insectoid is on the move. He reaches for one of the tiny face snakes, squeezes it until it dies, and continues one by one, while the snake man slowly bleeds to death. A sight Mantenna doesn’t get, because he found a way to fight without his hypnosis eyes.

Titfortat 11: Dragstor vs Mekaneck – Machine neck!

Titfortat

Dragstor, Hordaks spy vehicle, front line breaker, henchman for special tasks, 29 points in the table of skills, is super fast. When that poor guy got into Hordaks hands, he was turned into a machine, a living super power engine. It took him years to manage living with all the power he got, and he was never keen to make it through those years. Noise, heat, fumes, the pain, and Hordaks never ending tasks are torture. Only Hordaks evil magic keeps him under control, otherwise he would drive right into the deepest ocean and never come back.

No surprise that Mekaneck is his natural enemy. The look out, Eternias eyes on the ground caused too many problems already. And it’s personal as well. How on earth could a reasonable human decide to modify his body, to turn himself into a machine? The remaining human in Dragstor hates Mekaneck for knowingly using technology in his healthy body. How can the long necked spy with 28 points, and only 6 points for speed, handle a ring fight with a powerful enemy? He’s not a fighter, but he knows his weapons, and is one of the smarter guys around.

Dragstor is already blowing steam and fire, so let’s do this.

The member of the evil horde is in rage, vibrating, loud, dirty, spitting black oil. He’s running towards Mekaneck, not wasting a moment to judge the situation. Mekaneck is almost to late, but still manages to make that important step to the side to get out of Dragstors way. He turns around, and runs again. Mekaneck can only jump to the side. With a loud knock the humanoid falls onto his chest, turning himself into that feared one-wheeler. He starts to drive in big circles around in the ring, with the hero in the center of the black cloud of fumes and anger. Is he trying to impress his opponent, or is he blowing off steam, because he could get a grip on him?
Then the long neck comes into action. First you would think Mekaneck is reaching for air, or for a better view on the situation. But that’s not it. He looks down, and then falls. Like a giraffe, or a tree, the huge spy goes to the floor without any obvious reason. The neck falls right into Dragstors lane, and from one second to another, he takes off like a rocket, crushing into the invisible wall of that titfortat ring, where so many fights already took place. Turns out Mekaneck is well aware how much his neck can take. The smart guy turned his neck into a weapon. The raging motor monster is destroyed by his shear anger and speed.

Toy review: Mantenna

Toy review

Mantenna was one of my first MOTU figures in the 80s, and it absolutely made sense for me, because I was fascinated by insects and spiders since I could walk. 40 years later I will admit that Hordaks bug man and me, we have a love-hate relationship. And here’s why. When you are familiar with the basic anatomy of an insect, you will have sniffed out that Mantenna’s ears (!) must be a product of humongous fantasy. I mean ears! They do look like a giant version of Hordak’s ears, don’t know if that means anything. As a boy I thought Mantenna is a spider, but there was much more creativity behind that figure. It’s an insectoid bug horde monster thing.

Then the eyes, definitely hypnotic, but otherwise very human as well. No hint of compound insect eyes. I guess it’s a repeating pattern in the MOTU toyline. They don’t make sense, it’s not logical, and that’s what keeps it in your head. You chew on the imperfection trying to understand it.

The eyes-out-feature worked perfectly, great quality! ‘The spy with the pop-out eyes’ as Mattel called him, was able to shoot beams with them. So they might have thought a spy needs proper hearing, what goes of course hand in hand with the size of the ears.

The black patch where you would expect a nose in a face always looked like a spider to me, like a logo, but it would have weirdly aligned 10 legs. It just now appears to me it could be meant as a hole, even a mouth! My photo is taken under uv light, and the mouth looks like a sandworm’s mouth from Dune.

Then there’s two prominent fangs, like tarantulas have them parallel to the body.

What bothered me even more than the ears are the legs. It must have been an economical decision to merge two legs to one, so that Mantenna has four. It makes the legs look weirdly broad, almost like he’s a cowboy in chaps. Counting the arms in, we find six limbs on our Horde creature. Somehow Mantenna’s arms are a bit bent, making him look ready to draw his guns.

Compared to other figures, Mantenna seemed smaller, flatter, and kind weaker, but luckily the toy didn’t look as ridiculous as the cartoon character. His awesome quality, and the decent colors made him a great toy. Together with Leech, Grizzlor, Modulok and Dragstor, the Evil horde was a gang of unique monsters. The kind of monsters that made parents roll their eyes.

Titfortat 8: Roboto vs. Horde Trooper – Scrap metal for Hordak!?

Titfortat

You ask yourself why these two robots have a titfortat? Here’s why: Roboto probably wanted it. It shouldn’t be possible, but who if not Roboto is able to even manipulate titfortat?! This mechanic guy is a wonder boy, even to his make Man at arms.

Roboto is aware that Horde Troopers are programmed to collect raw materials for their own reproduction. For them, Roboto is nothing but a bunch of metal which they could use to produce more troopers.

Roboto likely calls for this battle to make a statement. He is the boss-robot on Eternia, and he’s not a warehouse!

2.1m, 200kg, 35 points for Roboto; fighting the 2.5m, 170kg and 31 points trooper. Horde Troopers are giant killing machines, but Roboto has the ability to think differently. He’s weirdly intelligent.

Let’s start this robotic titfortat!

The fight begins very quietly. Silent whirring noises and blinking lights make clear, here are two computers calculating well before striking.

And then it all happens like a well studied choreography. The Trooper strikes first, a red laser beam towards Roboto’s head. He bends his knees just enough to not get hit, and then fires back a double-laser beam. This is not a deadly strike, he fires high up to distract Hordak’s robot, moves to the left and cuts the Troopers arm off in a split second!

It becomes clear that the superior heroic Robot does not intend to end this quickly, he seems to enjoy the demolition of his opponent. No chance for the taller horde machine. Cruel 20 minutes later Roboto ends this titfortat by smashing the Troopers head under his foot. What a demonstration of sinister good power!

Crossover: Family horde

Crossovers

I totally understand that some people don’t like watching Family Guy. They go far to far sometimes, no, often. I love it. I do not like my crossover. Not because it is especially bad, or boring, no because it happened to be quite scary. Mostly Chris, who is now Creech, and even that name sounds intimidating, His leechy teeth look awesome, and he’s got green suction cups. Peter is Horde Pooper, the red bat goes well with his white shirt. He looks funny with no neck.

Megstor, Dragstor as Meg works well too. Both are kind of permanent victims of evil people.

Mosquitor and Stewie, that makes Mosqwie. His face impression is a bit weird. Maybe he’s insecure with the snozzle for his nozzle.

But his Teddy, Rupert, is the cutest Grizzlor ever. Lets call him Ruzzlor. He could easily tear them all apart, but he decided to enjoy the family life.

And last but not least Herbert with four legs and eyes apart, that’s Manbert the Hypno!

I made this drawing some years ago, and looking at it now I wished I had made it a bit more MOTU, and less Family Guy. What do you think?

Toy review: Leech

Toy review

The original Leech toy from the 80s was never my favourite, but I always liked it. It might have been the enormous size, or the dark green color in combination with the red Horde symbol, and the orange rings around what must be the leeches wrists.

Mattel gave Leech a unique body, like Two-Bad, Extendar, Grizzlor, Mantenna and some others. The huge round feet make a stable stand, though my Leech had always a bit wobbly legs. The photo is taken under uv light, and the worn off area in his inner legs fluorescent pretty strong for some reason. His arms are strong, but his muscles not as defined as the more human figures, they kind of remind me of Bud Spencer. His hands are real working suction cups! In the 80s She-Ra: Princess of Power series Leech would use these hands to drain energy from enemies by holding their head between the hands. On the original box, Leech holds Man-at-Arm up, using his mouth, not his hands. It says ‘Leech sucks the power from his enemies ‘. Because neither the hands, nor the mouth of the toy were made to hold another figure, it never really worked for me that he sucks energy. The mouth was a more sophisticated suction cup. It was flat, painted teeth on it, with a soft seal, the lips around it. A button on the back allowed us to pump a vacuum, when you pressed Leech against a flat surface. That worked well on glass, you could hang the heavy green horde member for some seconds. The hands wouldn’t hold him.

For the longest time I thought the flat mouth of the toy would be a compromise for the production. In fact the toy looks more like a leech than the more reptile-like cartoon version. Too bad I haven’t had a close-up of a real leech in the 80s! Making a leech one of the bulkiest members of the universe, with strong arms and legs, that’s what I love MOTU for!

It is the only green horde member, but he’s in good, green company. Mossman, Whiplash, Merman, Triclops, Man-at-Arms, Kobra Khan, and King Hiss are all very green.

Quality wise Leech is a great toy without flaws. The rubber is very durable, and the color rock solid. There’s a tiny bit of black mold on his hands, that’s it.

Toy review: Horde trooper

Toy review

The horde trooper is a very controversial character to me. I’m a huge fan of the evil horde, and I have many good memories of the 80s cartoons. But, the horde trooper is none of the real MOTU characters. It’s a soldier from mass production, more or less a walking bucket with no strength except for the shear number Hordak produced them. As a toy, it didn’t make sense, if you haven’t had dozens of them.

So all my childhood this figure was a gap filler unfortunately. And it’s quality didn’t help.

My problem was, or his problem was the instable flap. The Hordak-embodied button was cool, but the mechanism was not stable, so that the lid would open uncontrolled. You lift an arm, an the flap drops. Turn the head, drop.

Apart from that issue this figure is a cool looking toy. It has a fierce face, and a nice combination of pale grey, red and black. Other grey figures are few, Hordak and Stratos basically.

In terms of aging the Horde trooper is pretty good. Mine shows some yellowing on the legs, and the button made of soft rubber looks a bit worn off, but otherwise the material is pretty stable.

Titfortat 5: Tung Lashor vs. Modulok – Greetings from the King?!

Titfortat

Hefart’s titfortat goes into the next round! MOTU Snakeman vs. Horde, we thought that is just history. But now this battle?! Hordak couldn’t be banned for long obviously. He definitely pulls some strings.

But this fight very much looks like the snake King himself wants to send a message. Of course to Hordak. The old enemy. 

No way that Tung Lashor, the anaconda, the muscle man of the snake warriors, would seek the battle with Hordaks mysterious red thing. The two headed, or two one-headed, six, five, four or less legged set of living pieces. 

30 points, 2.5m high and 190kg of pure strength vs. 31 points for the living meat bits. What can possibly go wrong? 

Fight! Tung lashor is a squeezer, even his poisonous tung is made to squeeze. 

But how Modulok is gonna fight is so hard to say. Usually you only see him shooting from a hideout. Is he a fighter at all?

The snake immediately runs towards Modulok, grabs him and pouw! the red devil seems to explode! Is that it?

For sure not. His parts, all over the area, start crawling towards the irritated Snakeman. Arms grab, mouths bite and the power snake doesn’t know how to squeeze. Tiny opponents are not his’. He starts stepping on the parts, but this is not how he is used to fight. His legs are now covered, he tumbles! Falls! But then he uses his tung, green, and poisonous. A few seconds of contact and the pieces turn dark and seem to die. He throws, licks, smashes, until finally nothing moves. Modulok is beaten.

What a miserable fight. What a mess. #tunglashor #modulok #snakemen #evilhorde #motutitfortat 

Hefarts titfortat

Toy review: Grizzlor

Toy review

Grizzlor is in my opinion one of the MOTU masterpieces! They managed to draw a fine line between a scary monster, and a furry funny toy. Grizzlor is one member of the Horde, which I found all very well done and unique. He has a lot from a gorilla, except that a gorilla is black, and Grizzlor is brown. I would say he doesn’t share any obvious parts with other MOTU figures. The most prominent feature is of course his fur, which is of excellent quality and never came off or went smelly or anything. The shape of his torso is hidden under that dense fur, and I wasn’t able to find a photo of a stripped Grizzlor. So it remains a secret to me, how his torso looks, and I guess that’s for the better.

His arms and legs are also brownish, but without real fur. Instead the arms have an embossed fur-like structure. His hands are a bit plain, clumsy, shapeless, without any hint of claws or anything.

The legs are more standard shaped, but with the same structure of the surface. He is wearing black boots.

The head is not really distinguished from the body, there is just the mask of a face placed at the top of the torso.

He’s got the same crossbow as most horde members, his is green. I think no other crossbow was green. It goes well with yellow straps of his armor, which in this case is only a huge horde bat.

The combination of colors is well done, the brown fur with lighter brown arms and legs make him look like a creature that lives outdoors, and can take it cold, but also sunny.

The yellow straps are a nice eye catcher, while the bat is not that obvious. The dark green crossbow supports the idea of a gorilla living in the forests.

I can’t help myself, but the fur, and its color, remind me of another toy of the 80s, but luckily Mattel mastered the art of designing a serious horde member despite the similarities. You might remember the Monchichi? That slobby thumb-sucking monkey-hedge hock thing? It’s fur is a bit darker and lesser reddish, but else I see some similarities.

What I find most irritating on Grizzlor, is the fact that the body has no shape. He is from the top of his head to his hips just a hairy egg. No neck, no waist. That egg shape could easily result in a funny looking fur monster, but the long legs, and the really great, powerful face make him look awesome. I wouldn’t even see him look funny if someone would do his hair, but I won’t encourage anyone to do a make over with him! Grizzlor!

I always missed that kind of fur on Beastman. He would have deserved at least a bit of it, in orange of course. For all the other figures, even Battle Cat and Panthor, I’m glad they didn’t get “real fur”.

The UV only showed the dust on this Grizzlor, otherwise he would have looks pretty cool.